You can read the LA Parent version of this post HERE
How many of us are waiting for something to happen so our “real” life can begin? When I graduate from college then my life can start. When I get married, when I have a baby, when I get that job, when we move into that new house….I know I fall into this category. Over and over again. I’m always waiting for the next big thing to happen so my life can really start.
Yesterday I shared a moment with my children when they discovered caterpillars on the park sidewalk.
I’m not sure if they too are already fantasizing about the day their “real” lives will begin (though I do hear Kaleb say things like, “Mommy when I turn five, then can I watch Power Rangers?” ~ he just turned four!) but it was at that moment that I realized that this was my actual life and it was already happening! I’ve done most of the stuff on my list: I graduated from college. I had a fulfilling career. I met an amazing man and married him. I had two incredible children and inherited one from my husband. My life is on. There is no reason to keep delaying my full appreciation of it.
I recently heard that people don’t realize that they’re happy until the moment’s over. That made me so sad. It made me want to horde every moment so I can use every bit of it up while I still had it. Everything changes. Sometimes not fast enough, sometimes much too fast. But once it’s gone, it’s just a memory. I’m going to try and make my memories ones of moments I don’t regret not appreciating.
If you put your face close enough, these days, Kaleb may reach up and give it a squeeze. He may explore your cheeks with soft, tentative fingers and sometimes you might even get a heartbreaking giggle. And if you’re still standing, he’ll knock you over if he accompanies this burst of love with a cavernous display of his toothless gums. Or maybe that’s just me.
He’s really gotten very social lately. He smiles at strangers when they stop to compliment him in a store (as mommy tries to slyly back away from the nice, potential germ-carriers).
He used to cry when someone would stick their faces to close to his “turf” but no longer. He may glance at me for a quick smile of reassurance and then he’ll turn it on for his guest.
His mystery crying has stopped. I guess he’s old enough to start becoming a bigger part of this world (see previous entry). If he cries, there’s a tangible explanation. Mostly it’s because he’s tired. Mommy will sometimes lug him around because she’s still learning to live between nap times. Sometimes it’s hunger (And that’s a particularly loud one. No mistaking that one for say – boredom).
The hair blow dryer has become my best friend. Times when he’s too tired and fussy to sleep are quickly remedied with a 10 minute blast of rushing air (pointed away from the baby, of course!). I tried this as a potential remedy when I read that this “white noise” mimics the sound he heard in my womb. I don’t know, I wasn’t there but I’ll tell you – it works like a charm.
Turns out he’s a multi-tasker. He’s found his thumb and will suck on the little bitty thing whenever his heart desires. And sometimes it desires right in the middle of mealtime. Boob will compete with thumb for oral terrain. And sometimes he’ll miss his mouth and instead stick his thumb in or on his nose or maybe his eye. Occasionally it’ll end up in his ear.
We went camping last week. Well, kinda camping. We rented a motorhome so the baby would be more comfortable.
Now, I have always had very strong opinions about people who camp in motorhomes (Howard always laughs when I go down this road). When you have access to a bed and don’t have to walk across a campground in the middle on the night to pee, you’re not camping. When you can watch a DVD on a giant TV set and listen to the radio, you are not roughing it. I know some may disagree but I don’t care. If you don’t have to give up some of the modern conveniences to focus instead on the beauty of nature and your inner strength to endure it, what is the point of leaving your living room? Just make a day trip.
Anyway, we rented a pretty sweet 33-foot motorhome “for Kaleb’s sake.”
We parked it at our favorite surf beach in San Onofre.